sometimes i move too fast. sometimes i move to slow. sometimes i don't move at all.
life is bizarre, isn't it? we are so odd, running here and there, doing this and that, eating and sleeping, laughing and crying. living.
i continually find myself surprised with... me.
it's an odd place to be. 22. in my parents basement. going to school. working. dating. experiencing life. with facebook to fill everyone in on my day-today-exploits. oy vey.
but it's good too. i'm enjoying life. i'm living and learning much. i laugh often.
who knew i'd come back to alberta and go on more dates in 8 months than i did in 21 years? yeesh. but it's always leading somewhere. and where i'm settled now is a good place. it's a new place, a funny place, with lots of questions and uncertainties. but, once its on facebook there's no taking it back. it's good, just fast, and now slow, which would have been a smarter starting speed, but as i said, i'm ever learning and living. and as all things are, dating is an extention of that fact. he is good, and brings many smiles to my days, and keeps me sane. and is meeting my parents on tuesday.
school is good. i laugh, because, as shauna has found, i love accounting class. who knew?!?! the girls i'm closest to at school and i are all together again this semester, so that's enjoyable.
family is rewarding, thru whatever each day brings, it's rewarding. i'll be an auntie again in a month! truly exciting.
music is beauty. winter is wondrous. i love my farm adventures as much as, and some days more than, ever. life is good. God is good. there is much joy to be found in the face of day to day living. much learning to be had in the presence of a child. much grace to be seen in the eyes of a friend. and love abundant in those around me. i am blessed.
good thing, because when i was 18 i had 'one who is blessed' tattooed, in hebrew, on my body.
Monday, January 21, 2008
Monday, January 7, 2008
School
I'm just sitting here, taking a few last moments of freedom before i once again become engulfed in the world of higher education. 2.5 weeks was a short break, it seems. It was a good break, and many, wonderful times were had.
It's unfortunate that at this point, school is more of a means to an end than it is anything else, in my life. That makes it difficult to drag my butt to school 5 days a weeks, and to sit in the classroom and actually engage in what is going on around me. Unless what's going on around me is side conversation! ha. So, this semester, I hope to become more excited about school as a process, and not just getting it over with. I want to also enjoy this moment, not just let it pass by without taking the time to appreciate it.
The Canadian girl in me is rejoicing. Canada won the world juniors. And I'm learning hockey! I've picked up the hockey skates this winter, after having been on figure skates since I could walk, and I haven't fallen once! and last night my friend scott to me out to an outdoor rink in spruce and we passed a puck around and shot and i learned some defence. It's pretty rad. I'm pretty excited. I need to find hockey gloves that fit, because holding the stick is awkward when the fingers on the gloves are a solid inch longer than your own fingers. Eventually, I'm sure I will fall, but it was good times, and we are going again tonight! Dude, hockey is sweet.
It's unfortunate that at this point, school is more of a means to an end than it is anything else, in my life. That makes it difficult to drag my butt to school 5 days a weeks, and to sit in the classroom and actually engage in what is going on around me. Unless what's going on around me is side conversation! ha. So, this semester, I hope to become more excited about school as a process, and not just getting it over with. I want to also enjoy this moment, not just let it pass by without taking the time to appreciate it.
The Canadian girl in me is rejoicing. Canada won the world juniors. And I'm learning hockey! I've picked up the hockey skates this winter, after having been on figure skates since I could walk, and I haven't fallen once! and last night my friend scott to me out to an outdoor rink in spruce and we passed a puck around and shot and i learned some defence. It's pretty rad. I'm pretty excited. I need to find hockey gloves that fit, because holding the stick is awkward when the fingers on the gloves are a solid inch longer than your own fingers. Eventually, I'm sure I will fall, but it was good times, and we are going again tonight! Dude, hockey is sweet.
Wednesday, January 2, 2008
A Swift Kick to the Shins
A friend recently said "i think i'm quite destined to be a spinster" and my immediate response was "believe me, i would rather have zero boy drama in my life than frustrating, ridiculous boy drama."
the more i think about that, the more true it becomes. i remember being 'single and then some' (thanks gav). and i didn't so much mind that, most of the time.
my return to alberta has been shrouded in boy drama from the outset, in many varied, and ridiculous forms. and the drama is wearying. it makes me not want to put myself out there anymore. after a while, first dates get monotonous, and all you want is a second date. to meet someone you actually want to get to know. and then that happens. and then the boy turns out to have insane commitment issues and disappears off the face off the earth after 3 months. good times.
i'm not angry. i'd rather know 3 months in than a year in. but so now, 3 weeks after the end of that. i'm back in the first date world. and, truth be told, its not all its cracked up to be. i truly cannot in good conscience turn down a genuine date offer, from someone that is putting themself out there to ask me, and i don't think its fair that i do, without good reason. and so i go, but generally find that although the conversation may be enjoyable, that i'm not interested in that second date.
to everything there is a season. you have to kiss alot of frogs to find your prince. yada yada yada. i wish i found comfort in cliches, but i do not. what i do derive strength from is that the cliches are there because many girls have been where i am now, and have eventually found their way thru.
i guess there's not much of a point to this. but it's what's on my mind most these days. and its the holidays, which means many conversations with those who you don't see too often, and lots of 'so... any men in your life' questions. not my favorite question to answer, i'll tell you that. haha. but that's how she goes this day.
i'm ever so very glad for good guy friends in my life. especially ones that ask if i want them to go hunt down the disappearing-off-the-face-of-the-earth-boy and teach him a lesson. and the ones that talk to me when i need to hear a boys perspective and give really really really good hugs. somedays, you just really need a good boy hug, and it changes the whole course of your day.
i'm sure its just as frustrating to be a boy in the dating game. i wish our society embraced honesty, and that we could all just be vulnerable and open, and safe in doing so. but that's not how it is. and at 22, i'm not jaded enough to stop putting myself out there. plus, i like meeting new people and making new friends, if nothing else. but i'm ever so very glad for the friends i do have!
the more i think about that, the more true it becomes. i remember being 'single and then some' (thanks gav). and i didn't so much mind that, most of the time.
my return to alberta has been shrouded in boy drama from the outset, in many varied, and ridiculous forms. and the drama is wearying. it makes me not want to put myself out there anymore. after a while, first dates get monotonous, and all you want is a second date. to meet someone you actually want to get to know. and then that happens. and then the boy turns out to have insane commitment issues and disappears off the face off the earth after 3 months. good times.
i'm not angry. i'd rather know 3 months in than a year in. but so now, 3 weeks after the end of that. i'm back in the first date world. and, truth be told, its not all its cracked up to be. i truly cannot in good conscience turn down a genuine date offer, from someone that is putting themself out there to ask me, and i don't think its fair that i do, without good reason. and so i go, but generally find that although the conversation may be enjoyable, that i'm not interested in that second date.
to everything there is a season. you have to kiss alot of frogs to find your prince. yada yada yada. i wish i found comfort in cliches, but i do not. what i do derive strength from is that the cliches are there because many girls have been where i am now, and have eventually found their way thru.
i guess there's not much of a point to this. but it's what's on my mind most these days. and its the holidays, which means many conversations with those who you don't see too often, and lots of 'so... any men in your life' questions. not my favorite question to answer, i'll tell you that. haha. but that's how she goes this day.
i'm ever so very glad for good guy friends in my life. especially ones that ask if i want them to go hunt down the disappearing-off-the-face-of-the-earth-boy and teach him a lesson. and the ones that talk to me when i need to hear a boys perspective and give really really really good hugs. somedays, you just really need a good boy hug, and it changes the whole course of your day.
i'm sure its just as frustrating to be a boy in the dating game. i wish our society embraced honesty, and that we could all just be vulnerable and open, and safe in doing so. but that's not how it is. and at 22, i'm not jaded enough to stop putting myself out there. plus, i like meeting new people and making new friends, if nothing else. but i'm ever so very glad for the friends i do have!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)