I went to CBC

Since I went to CBC during the tenure of Todd Slechta, I often find myself thinking random Jewish thoughts, quoting rabbis throughout my day, and listing off Biblical Postures and Principles in a cultish manner. Good times.
One of those that I most frequently reiterate is 'To experience true joy, you must first know true sorrow'. I take a lot of liberties with this, I put many opposite life experiences in the places of joy/sorrow.
Life is hard. Some days, excruciatingly so. I don't know if I'm always up to the challenge of the hardships of life, sometimes they overwhelm me, and I am called to be a person of hope. I cannot fathom walking thru this life without knowing the hope that I do, there is despair and harm in every corner. You can do your best to shield you and yours from it, and so many times, you still won't win the battle, isn't that a despairing thought? Yet, what is bizarre is that tho in a heartbeat I would choose not to have experienced many moments of my life, I am glad for the ways they have shaped me. I'm glad that I'm not a bubble person, I've seen to much crap in life to be a bubble person, and I have a wide array of unchurched friends and family and acquaintances who I don't think I would be given such depth of relationship with if I were one who did not deeply and intimately know sorrow and fear and pain. So in that way, I deeply appreciate the crap of life, it gives you an authority to speak into other lives, not because you can one up them, but because you are a person of grace, or trying to be a person of grace, who can say, I empathize, I don’t sympathize, I empathize.
And in these days, I need to remember that. I need to remember that I am called to be a person of grace, and that even when life is crappy, I need to act out of who I am called to be, not how I feel. I am called to love, to forgive, to be gracious, and yet to crave Justice. The Sermon on the Mount speaks with authority of this, that there is an example of character, that if I choose to claim to follow Jesus Christ, I need to follow. For He has loved me, He has called me according to His purpose, and even when I feel as tho I am free falling thru life, He holds me in the palm of his hand, which is more hopeful than seeking to put a positive spin on a free fall by relating it to Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers. (Why do I say such random crap? Oh my.)
You see, my parents have been separated for 4 months. In living a life that has been thru some horrible stretches, I have staked my confidence in the fact that I come from a functional family unit. That has been stripped away, and I am utterly humbled by the realization that truly, my confidence must be in Christ alone. No matter how high the pedestal I place people on, I cannot source my confidence from their example, it must stem from Christ. So daily, my prayer is that I will act in each moment out of who He has called me to be, and not how I feel. I am first and foremost the child of the One who exemplifies grace and love and joy and peace, and so when I am lacking those things, I can turn to Him, and He alone will sustain me.
I am well aware I’m far from the only one who lives thru crap in their life, and we all have our own variations of crap in our lives. It looks different, it affects us differently, but when it comes down to it, my prayer for each of us is that we act out of who we are called to be. That when we look back on these days, we will know that we walked thru them with grace, and that we were able to rely on He who has loved us and called us according to His purpose. Take courage in the knowledge that He is more than enough for you, that He can sustain you thru every circumstance and that He holds you in the palm of his hand. His love is overwhelmingly abundant, and when we posture ourselves to receive all that He longs to pour into us, even in the worst of times, we will be able to proclaim in confidence all the more boldly the truth of His love to those who surround us. And when it’s all laid out in the open, isn’t that who we are to be? People of love and grace, and who can steward not just their resources, but their lives and stories, successes and failures, with others, so that thru relationship with us, others can see and know the power of Christ’s redemption and love? For He is good, and His mercy endures for ever. Our lives are our best form of worship, and so, even still, amidst whatever life circumstances you are facing, my challenge to you, and to me, is that you let your life be your statement of worship.

Random

I've had the HNIC theme song as my cell phone ring for several years, and now, it's no longer the song of HNIC. Any suggestions for a replacement? Or should I be a diehard to the old school and stick with it? You can download Oilers specific ringtones, but those are less classy than the old school HNIC theme song, conjuring up memories of Don Cherry and his rad outfits and Foster Hewitt proclaiming that it's Hockey Night in Canada time. My heart is sad.

I work in a church. I like it. I'm volunteering with youth again. I like it. Life is so pattern based, I keep reliving the same experiences in different places. Interesting.

I wrote off a car. It was possibly the most humbling experience of my life, even tho it was deemed no fault. I realized my own humanity in a terrifying and humbling way. It's good to be alive.